insecurities part 1.

instagram: @bluekayaks

website: bluekayaks

Being in such a technological age where beautiful has one set definition, it’s very hard to find your place and identity. Long hair, slim nose, full lips, bright eyes, skinny body but full hips, long legs; so many different things! You have to own the right things, have X amount of friends, drive certain cars, and let’s not forget the PERFECT aesthetic on social media. Travel 24/7, have money, photogenic boyfriend/girlfriend and the list goes on.

Growing up I only thought white people were beautiful, needless to say, I didn’t find myself very attractive. I struggled all through elementary, middle, and even high! But one night I came across a Bible verse that stated “Oh, don’t worry; we wouldn’t dare say that we are as wonderful as these other men who tell you how important they are! But they are only comparing themselves with each other, using themselves as the standard of measurement. How ignorant!” ‭‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭10:12‬ This hit me in a extremely powerful way. We are ignorant to compare ourselves to all these models and people and to use a mere human as a measurement of our own self worth! God then showed me all these flashbacks of when I would cry all night looking at beautiful girls and wonder why He didn’t make me like them. He showed me how much time and joy the devil stole from my life because I would dwell and covet over the lives of others, missing my own blessings. To tie this all together, I believe in order to fully and 100% love yourself, it includes a TON prayer, but I also believe it includes the desire to not take back anything you endured during your self love journey. If I hadn’t gone through all the turmoil of the lies the enemy fed me, I wouldn’t be where am I right now and I wouldn’t be able to touch whoever is reading this or whoever struggled the same way I did. So yes there are beautiful women out there but just know you’re one of them! Including the stretch marks or not so straight teeth. Including the freckles or the 5’2 height. Everything makes you who you are, and it makes you someone you can’t find anywhere else and that is a blessing in and within itself.

And when you want to tone up your body or dye your hair or clear your skin, do it for YOU and not for them! xoxo bluekayaks